Ginger Ale – Ale for Gingers

I've been tagged!  I have never been so glad in my life to be tagged.  I wanted to write something on my blog but had nothing to say and then – WHAM!  I was going through my blog list and found this!

I was tagged by Rose at The Golden Road and I must confess I'm not sure what the "SISTERHOOD OF THE WORLD BLOGGERS AWARD" is... but maybe it has something to do with the sisterhood of the traveling pants???  I don't know; I'm afraid I'm ignorant of such things.  But I'm happy to receive it in any case.

Rules

*Acknowledge the person who passed the award to you and provide their link.
*Include the award logo on your blog.
*Answer the ten questions posted below.
*Make up your own ten questions for the next people.
*Nominate blogs and link those you have especially enjoyed reading. The number you can select is up to you.
*Notify each individual that you have nominated them.

(Thank you, somebody, for allowing me to chose the number of blogs....)

So now I have to answer the following questions, and I am so honored!  She is so good at asking questions:

1.  What is your favourite accent? (British, Irish, Scottish, etc.)

That is an incredibly hard question to answer, but I think I have to go with Scottish.  I actually have ancestry from all three, so I'm entitled to pick any which one of them that I chose.  ...I figure.
2.  Your house is on fire; you have 60 seconds.  What is the one thing that you grab? (Yes, I stole this question from the movie Leap Year.  If you haven't seen it, you should.  It is marvelous.)

My computer?  Or maybe my flash drive.  Nothing against the Bible, Rosary, pictures, pillows, or stuffed animals or anything sentimental – but life would suck if I didn't have either one of those two things – my homework is there.
3.  You are taking a ramble through the woods heedless of time or place.   Suddenly, you find yourself miserably lost.  What do you do?  (Hysteria is a acceptable option.)

I would begin to panic – not gonna lie, because this has happened to me before only I wasn't miserably lost, only slightly.  But then I would calm my panic because I'm more prone to panic attacks lately and that wouldn't be a good idea in the middle of the woods.  Then I would pick a direction, based on the sun, and walk that way.
4.  What is your worst fear?

My worst fear is getting left behind, being forgotten.  When all is said and done, I'm not afraid of snakes, bees, or even spiders (although spiders come close...) – I'm afraid of being forgotten and left out by everyone or anyone that I love.
5.  If you could instantaneously be fluent in one language, which would it be?

A tough one.  I really want to speak Latin fluently for the heck of it.  But Italian would be nice.  But then, my grandmother speaks German and would be really impressed... plus it could come in handy when I go to Europe.
6.  Would you rather have plain vanilla/chocolate ice cream or a sundae with all the toppings?

Another tough one!  But I think I'm going to say a sundae, but I won't finish it!
7.  Would you rather watch a scary movie while at home alone or ride the largest roller coaster in the world?

Ride the largest roller coaster in the world.  Duh.
8.  You're stranded on an island for a year.  Choose one fictional character to have on the island with you.

Peter Pan.
9.  What is one of the most thrilling things you have ever done?

Driving comes pretty darn close.  Scary roller coasters is another.  Hanging with friends trumps all.  ...I guess I've lived a pretty boring life, what can I say?
10.  You are swimming with a group of friends when a splashing fight breaks out, describe your methods of warfare and survival.

Splash like crazy, laugh like no one's gonna get hurt, and then tackle the archenemy.

I'm gonna tag:

Kathleen at The Messy Desk of Me

Maggie at A Window on the West

Una Mariah at Petticoats and Muckboots

The Mad Elvish Poet (if, indeed, that's all I can call you) at The Thoughts of the Mad Elvish Poet

So now my own ten questions for these lovely ladies:

I. Quick, name a movie.

II. You get married and have a girl – what kind of world are you living in and what will you call her?  Why and what does it mean?

III.  You also have a boy – what will you call him?  Why and what does it mean?

IV.  What mythical creature do you think most represents you?

V.  Quick, name one to three random facts about yourself. (For example, I get weird cravings for ginger ale.)

VI.  When you hear "British," you think ________.

VII.  What is the title of the book nearest you right now?

VIII.  What is one brilliant thing that happened to you in the last twenty-four hours?

IX.  Have you ever been licked by a cat?

X.  What is the state of your sock drawer?

And by the way, I remember one time when I did this, and obviously you people (not necessarily the four people above – I don't actually remember who) had no fun with this at all.  Please, be creative.  Have fun with it.  I'm asking you these questions because I know you have imaginations that can have a stark-raving-mad time with this.  (So don't you dare say, "Where we'll live and what we name our children, if God wills we have any, will be up to the both of us...."  Nobody wants theology, we want fantasy.)

Oh yeah, and fun fact: ginger ale was invented expressly for gingers.  ...True story.

Okay, not really,

~Meggy

The Importance of Keeping a Diary

Do you keep a journal?  I do.  I collect journals, actually.  I usually have a hard time walking away from a journal display without buying one.  Like with anything else, I'm picky about my journals – size, features, graphics, etc.  But the bookstore here has a phenomenal selection.  Every time I go in there I want to buy one!!!  But I don't.  Although I gave in once.  Even though I didn't need it and I don't really use it.  But it's really cute.

Anyway, I have kept a journal for as long as I can remember, and I have a small collection of dairies back home that I go through sometimes.  ...Oh gosh.  If ever I doubt that there's a God, I just have to pick up one of those dairies and skim through them.  Not because they're filled with accounts of miracles or visions; it's because it reminds me where I've been.  And where I've come.  And how.

Sometimes I just blush tomato red when I read them, and I've considered burning them or parts of them.  And maybe I should.  Some would say that it would be symbolic of letting go of the past.  For me, it reminds me not to make those same stupid mistakes again.  I read something that I, have since, decided I am not proud of; but sometimes I realize that I'm doing it again.  It's a reality check; but not always in a negative way.  Sometimes I come across an inspiring insight that I wrote once upon a time – and I don't even remember it.  Or I realize that I've forgotten to look at life through those rosier-colored lenses.  It's definitely a reality check.  Not everything you learn sticks with you.

A journal also allows you to organize in an unorganized manner the thoughts that are going on in your head so that you can decide whether and how you'll share those thoughts with someone else – and the best part?  No one will judge you on your grammer, logic, or feelings.  Unless you have a mother that, for some reason, feels she has the right to read your journal if she finds it.  I know someone (a naive someone) who advised me to keep a journal but to keep it hidden, because she always read her daughter's journal when she came across it.  She also advised I burn my used journals, so you can see how much I value her opinion....  I was rather shocked when I heard that she read her daughter's journal – that just seemed so wrong.  But everyone is different I guess, and I've since wondered if someone would read my journal if I left it out – sometimes I left it out so that people could read it (if I was proud of what I wrote or was feeling vengeful; as far as I know, no one ever did read it. They would probably have let me know if they had been through my journal....).

Writing things in a journal, I've noticed, almost justifies you to yourself.  It's written down – in this nifty little book – therefore, it's real; it's valid; it's important.  It doesn't mean that you are delusional and egotistical – you usually can't be because you've got nothing to hide in a journal so you end up telling the truth.  But when you write down your feelings, it makes you feel better because what you're feeling is now based on a semi-logical train of thought.  You hope.  Not always, but sometimes.  I know that when I'm depressed, it rarely helps to write about it, because it's illogical to go on being depressed but there's nothing I can do to change it.

And so there you go.  My thoughts on journals in case you were wondering.  And I'm sure you were – you were probably chomping at the bit screaming, "HOW DOES MEGGY FEEL ABOUT JOURNALS?!?!  I MUST KNNNOOOOOW!"  Yeah, well, now you do.

...And yes, I said nifty.

Yikes.

~Meggy

Valentine's Day

A Thousand Years

I'm Gonna Be

Why Don't We Just Dance

Ash Wednesday

Okay, I'm not going to actually talk much about Ash Wednesday.  I've probably written about it before, and if you scan the list on the side of all the blogs I follow, you can probably find an entry on one of them about Lent.  If that's what you're looking for, go scan those, 'cuz I've been there, done that.  Moving on.

Lent is, you know, a BIG DEAL.  Especially for Catholics, and now we have the added trial of the pope's resignation.  The world is in turmoil.  I mean, much of the world couldn't care less about Pope Benedict's resignation; but there are so many other issues, and what affects one group has ripple effects throughout the world.  So, you know, pray and stuff.

The thing is, I can't say anything that I haven't already said before.  And I certainly can't think of anything to say that hasn't been said by someone before, and whoever it was, he probably said it a lot better than I ever could.  So go to the experts if you want literature on Lent – don't come to me.  Just sayin'.

Click HERE to see previous posts on Lent

Ummmmm... but I'm not saying anything on Lent this year....  I'm gonna be too busy discovering it myself to teach it to anyone else.  For better or worse.

-----

Anyhow, I'm involved in a little known ministry called "Ministry to Moms."  Long story short, I'm a mother's helper.  It's the best ministry work ever.  When I first started this ministry is about the time that I closed my mind to religious life.  I've been pretty sure for some time that I was called to marriage, but being part of a family again and taking care of children was what did it for me.  I've got a "keep your mind open to God's signs" policy, but sometimes you've got to clamp your mind shut on something that God's been hitting you over the head with.  I just have to marry and keep house and raise kids.  It's sort of a necessity.  It's kind of always been my calling.  My sister, on the other hand, is considering religious life, and I think she's rather more suited to it.

Ummmmm, not sure why I told you that.

Oh! I guess because my "Steubie Mom" is having her fourth baby boy today.  I can't wait to meet him!

~Meggy

Everybody

Right Now

Right now:

• I'm listening to "Don't You Wanna Stay," which is a song I really don't like.  So now I'm listening to "Wide Open Spaces."

• I'm studying Latin:

Parva et brevis sum.

I have no idea if that's right.  But whatever.

Parva sed fortis sum.

????????

I'm mixing adjectives and nouns here, hello?  Not sure if I'm allowed to do that....

• I'm not studying Latin. Obviously.
• I'm missing someone.
• I'm lonely.
• I'm bored.
• I'm now listening to "All Your Life"

Yes, I'm listening to a country station.

• I wish I was hanging with friends but I very much can't right now.
• I've yet to go to Mass.  I hate going to Mass in the afternoon – but that's what you get for sleeping in.
• I've got spring fever, and I can't wait to go home for the summer and dig up my garden again.  The pumpkins are going to be successful this year, no questions asked.  And so is everything else.  Last season, I failed miserably at a lot of it.  But it was fun anyway!
• I'm very, very hungry, and I'm missing my momma's cooking.  I'm missing my cooking.
• I'm glad to be here, but I'm missing Boston and the fresh air in my home town – the pines, the sugar houses, and the wood fires.

Have a great Sunday, guys.  Ash Wednesday is only a few days away!

~Meggy

Dating – a (not so) new perspective

What I'm about to say may cause ripple affects within my small community of bloggers.  I hope and pray that the ripples will be favorable when my name is seen in there, but whether it is favorable or not, I feel I have to put this out there.  I know my readers and fellow bloggers that make up my small online community all are looking for satisfaction in the romance department.  I've written posts about it; I've read posts about it; I've read books and articles and heard talks on it.  But I have to say this about everything I thought about relationships – all the answers I got from those sources, although I believed them, left me very unsatisfied and anxious.  What I'm about to say is a little radical.

This is all based off a homily by one of the TORs here on campus, so if you don't like what I have to say, may I just refer you to him?  On the other hand, I'm not just repeating what he said – I believe every word he said with a passionate, grateful relief.

He is a spiritual director to many and, of course, he hears confessions.  He has given more advice on dating and marriage than he probably should have to – some people here are just so stupid.  No offense, because I know I am too.

Let's start with what he said on marriage because I'm pretty sure we can all agree on that and it's wise to start on common ground.

Marriage is for the emotionally and mentally ready, not for those who just fell in love.  Men, are you ready to take care of your wife and child? give up your free lifestyle? get a job and support them at the cost of all else?  Women, have you seen a counselor about your past? whether it was filled with abuse or one night stands or premarital sex of any kind, you need to get it worked out before you get into a serious relationship.  Are you ready to possibly give up your dreams in order to be a homemaker? to raise screaming children? to support your husband as he works hard to support you? to be the heart of your home?  If not, men and women, you cannot get married and assume that it will come in time.

Here's an example of a scenario you may want to consider: Man Roberts meets cute little Woman who goes on compulsive shopping sprees.  The two get married and are living happily.  Then Roberts goes over seas for a tour of duty, putting his life on the line for two years, and leaving his lonely wife at home.  Finally, after two years of serving our country and putting his life on the line, Roberts returns home to find that Mrs. Roberts has spent his entire life savings away.  ...What happens?  It's in times like these that temptations arise – not when everything is going perfectly.  So you have to think of these things.

But how do you find your soulmate?

I've heard this message a lot: "I kissed dating goodbye!"  I think there's even a book titled that.  ...As you probably guessed (especially if you know my writing style), I'm about to debunk that.

But probably not in a way you expect.

The problem with modern day dating is that if a guy asks a girl out on one date, the girl starts looking at wedding dresses (and nowhere is this a bigger problem than on the campus of Franciscan University).  Guys can't even ask girls out for fear of the suggestion being taken as a proposal!  Something my friend has been telling me but that never really got through to me is that you can date just to get to know the other person and figure out if you like them and if you're compatible.  I would like to suggest (and as I do, I'm prepared to duck) that this is a very important concept.

Just about everyone in my corner of the blogosphere swoons over old-fashioned rules of courting.  In fact, just the other day, I read a post about a post on another blog about the courting rules around the time of fiery Anne Shirley.  I found it interesting (although I can't say that I was swooning, as you'll see if you read my comments: Rules of Courting in the 1900s on The Golden Road w/ link to original article).

Therefore, I'm going to try to manipulate you by relying on the romance of calling something "old fashioned" and examine a concept from the 1900s, but a few decades later.  Try about the time of the 40s and 50s.  Maybe the 60s.  They had this concept called "going steady."  Before "going steady," a guy could ask a girl out on a date, ask another girl out on a date, ask a third girl out on a date, ask the second girl out on another date, ask a fourth girl out on a date....  Then, slowly, a guy and girl could become slightly more attached, and at that point, they could "go steady."

The key here is that you meet a lot of different people, and you learn more about people and you learn more about yourself.  You learn about what you're compatible with and what you're not compatible with.  You learn what you're looking for in a spouse and you learn who makes a really good friend – and you learn who doesn't.  But it's important that you don't put your whole heart and soul into that first date.  You're light and free.

Why is this a good idea?  Because (and I'm going to look at it from a girl's perspective here because I am one and so is most of my audience) if you focus all your efforts on just one man and he never asks you out or you go out for a while only to realize you're not made for each other, you've wasted days, weeks, maybe months or even years getting to know only one person and also ruling out everyone else in the name of "faithfulness."

After you go steady for a while (during which each only dates the other), the couple can mutually decide that they're in a serious relationship.  Then after a while, they can mutually agree that this could be heading for marriage.  And eventually, engagement can be a mutual thought.

I know everyone is going to be up in arms because they want their engagement to be a surprise.  But just how surprised do you want to be?  Agreeing that you're ready for it as a couple is not an engagement, it's just a go ahead for the man and a status update for the woman (and I'm not talking about Facebook).

Let me give you an example so that this makes a little more sense and you can better understand why this is genius:

I recently met a very nice guy who has shown a marked interest in me pretty much from the beginning.  Although I like him very much, I'm not particularly attracted to him.  But I'm not going to write him off because how on earth do I know what God has planned?  And just because I have an interest in someone else doesn't mean that it's going to work out.  It would be incredibly dumb to push "Mike" away just because I don't feel anything for him, only to realize after ages of going after someone unreachable how much I actually love "Mike."  And then what could I do after ditching him?

So modern idea of dating?  I still think we should throw it in the trash.  Incredibly-ancient-idea of dating?  I think we should put those knights in shining armor into a novel and snap it shut.  There is a man in shining armor out there, but not just anyone that comes to your door is going to be him.  And maybe you've been overlooking him because you're focusing all your efforts on one person before you even know if that person remembers your name.

And that's basically what the homily was about.  These days, when we should not even be at the "going steady" stage, emotionally we're trying to be at the "serious relationship" stage.

So the Franciscan fantasy (from the girl's perspective) is to find the perfect man, get married right out of college (at the latest), and have nine kids and dress them all in Catholic school uniforms (in the words of Father).  But in our attempt to simplify marriage, we've oversimplified it into a very complicated way of male-female relations.  After all, I'm not exaggerating when I say that people here really do assume marriage is on its way when they see you talking to someone of the opposite sex.  I've done it myself (although I flatter myself, I didn't take it that far).

So there's nothing wrong with being a one-guy girl (or a one-girl guy).  I'm one of those.  But maybe the girls/guys that don't commit right away have something on us.  (Story of my life, right?)  Besides, my friend and I were observing the other day that people become more universally desirable when someone shows an interest in them – not really sure why that is but 'tis true!

Guys and girls should be able to hang out and get to know each other without making a commitment to each other.  So maybe those books on ditching dating are completely and utterly true when taken into context with modern dating.  But that puts way too much pressure on me to reject flirts until I'm sure that I could possibly be interested in them.  Not that that's been much of a problem but you know.

Long story short – really long story short – guy and girl need to be on the same page.  And they need to read those pages slowly.

(I highlighted the sections that are directly from the homily.  The rest are the details that he used and I filled them in best I could, or that I added based on my audience and personal experience.)

~Meggy

EDIT: Read THIS

Continuing with the annoying string of music in honor of Valentines Day:

Enjoy

Singing in the Rain

~Meggy

Vanilla Twilight

~Meggy

It's Fate Baby, It's Fate

~Meggy

You're Awful

~Meggy

I See You

~Meggy

I Fall In Love Too Easily

~Meggy

Red Month

Since this is February – the "month of red" – and we are a ginger, precious, let's celebrate the color red!

I am actually fond of the color red, as it is closely related to the lovely color of purple (a distant cousin trice removed or something like that), and let's face it, red is a lovely, eye-catching color in its own right.

It catches your eye a lot better than most other colors.  Why?  I don't know, but that's a question for another day.

Red is definitely easier to pick out in a room full of other colors, as my family can attest to.  Look for gingers all in a row and you've found us.  You can't say the same for blond, black, or brown, can you?  Usually no.

And as you may imagine, there have been studies done on redheads.  Yup.  We're your lab rats.  Okay, not really, but there have been studies conducted for various reasons.

For example, take a look at this article from a site with unconfirmed credibility:

The first study revealed that redheads are more sensitive to thermal pain (i.e. perception of pain brought on by excessive cold and heat), and that they're also more resistant to the pain-numbing effects of certain anesthetics. The second study found that redheads required, on average, 19% more anesthetic than dark-haired (black or brown-haired) women. (Interestingly, neither study recruited blonde test participants.)

But the life of a redhead isn't all pain and suffering; a study led last year by researcher Lars Arendt-Nielson revealed that redheaded women are actually less sensitive to stinging sensations (like that of a pinprick) than either blondes or brunettes.  [This would explain why I can thrust needles through my fingers and not even notice.] So what's going on here? Researchers aren't entirely sure, but one hypothesis ties back — perhaps unsurprisingly — to redheads' mutant melanocortin 1 receptor (MC1R).

Bizarre?  Here's the explanation:

People with fair skin and rosy locks get their distinctive looks from mutations in the gene that codes for melanocortin 1 receptor, a protein that aids in the synthesis of the pigment melanin.
...
Like most cell surface receptors, MC1R's activity is regulated by the binding of a specific set of complementary proteins. When it comes to pigment production, those proteins are called melanocyte stimulating hormones (MSH). In 98% of the population, MSH cause MC1R to production dark eumelanin, but in redheads, their mutant MC1R lead to the production of a red-tinged pheomelanin, instead. But here's the catch: melanocortin 1 receptors also interact with molecules that are structurally similar to melanocyte stimulating hormones, including hormones called endorphins. Endorphins have a whole bunch of physiological functions, but one of their primary roles is one of pain relief. Just remember: "endorphin" stands for "endogenous morphine," and morphine is a powerful painkiller.

Okay, a lot of technical terms here, and if you're as bad at absorbing science as I am, you probably only got the gist of what they were saying.  But that's fine, there won't be a quiz on this (can I get a sigh of relief?).

Anyway, interesting, isn't it?

There is also a rumor that redheads don't go grey.  But it's not youthful color for us forever – we go WHITE.  Which I'd prefer anyway.

And apparently, Aristotle is known for believing that redheads are emotionally unhousebroken.  I can't help but wonder if maybe he's prejudiced.

And that's the first entry for "Red Month"
~Meggy

Your Song

~Meggy