The Kingdom

"Therefore, that I might not become too elated, a thorn in the flesh was given to me, an angel of Satan, to beat me, to keep me from being too elated. Three times I begged the Lord about this, that it might leave me, but he said to me, " My grace is sufficient for you, for power is made perfect in weakness." I will rather boast most gladly of my weaknesses, in order that the power of Christ may dwell with me. Therefore, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and constraints, for the sake of Christ; for when I am weak, then I am strong."

Read this as you wait in line for Confession. Some of the best readings happen to be on Saturday when I'm in the queue for Reconciliation. This one was from June 20th.

Paul is not my favorite writer, but he wrote passages that are truly inspiring. This section really gave me hope, but it reaffirmed what I should have known - imperfection, while still imperfection, does not mean we are hated by God. Although we fall, God says it's okay that we haven't conquered our failings yet. Another saint, I don't remember who, wrote that our sin is an opportunity for humility. It gives us a chance to remember our dependence on God and to rely all the more on his mercy.

"And all this is from God, who has reconciled us to himself through Christ, and given us the ministry of reconciliation, namely, God was reconciling the world to himself in Christ, not counting their trespasses against them and entrusting to us the message of reconciliation."

When I go to Mass, especially a Latin Mass - and the higher, the more so - I can't help but picture the throne room in Rohan. Perhaps Gondor, with its steward. Or some palace in days of antiquity.

I think that's what so many people miss - the traditions and practices and ceremonies aren't cult rituals. It's a kingdom we're in and it's a king we're worshipping. God doesn't need it, but neither does the queen of England. But that doesn't mean it doesn't serve a function. It facilitates a relationship between Lord and servant. God is more than just Lord and Savior - and yet he is our Lord and Savior and Creator. . . and Liturgical rites serve to remind us that this is so. They give us a chance to re-pledge our allegiance to our King.

The Mass and other sacraments are important for other reasons, but this has been my reflection.

I know not everyone believes in God and that makes me kind of sad - for many reasons. Non-believers are missing out on something beautiful. They think they see something they don't like, but they haven't truly experienced it. It's a beautiful, solid relationship that's hard to live up to. It's like when two people decide to split up rather than confess to their mistakes and reconcile. Or when someone thinks moral goodness is what's tormenting them and it's actually the bad that drags them down. And this division hinders understanding between persons.

I apologize if this comes across the wrong way to you, but I'm not trying to convince anyone to convert. I am nowhere near perfect and I am struggling to forgive myself - and so this is a reflection on the love of God and, sort of, my participation in his kingdom. If it doesn't really make sense to you, sorry for wasting your time. It's how I feel nonetheless.

Nonetheless is a great word.